Hexcentric! O Hexcentric!
Unloved by most
Hated by some
But you can count
On a friend, but just one.
That’s me, O Hexcentric!
I’ll be your pal!
I’ll place you forever
You know that I shall.
Some say that you’re useless
And have limited range
But we both know that claim
Is a little bit strange.
You’ll fit in constrictions
Where no others will
Deep in wide cracks
Which cams cannot fill.
You’ll often be bomber
When other gear fails
And you’re often a feature
In my most legendary tales.
You’re versatile, handy,
Both active and passive
The range of your sizes
Is really quite massive
You come with a wire
Or sometimes a sling
And this is a bonus,
A really neat thing.
It lowers the drag
Of that pesky rope
A task which, alone,
Other pieces can’t cope.
You’re light as a feather
When compared to a bag
Of spring-loaded devices
With a hefty price tag.
Some say you’re noisy
Actually… they’re 100% right.
Fucking hell, Hexcentric. You are the loudest, most obnoxious thing in the known universe. I take back all those nice things I said about you… You’re dead to me.
Ryan Siacci, Esq.
July 2017